When is it too much?

 When is pressure, self imposed or brought on externally healthy and when is it too much?

I've always been a very driven person.  I've worked tons of hours in order to achieve at a high level.  I didn't try to compete with others.  The competition was with myself to do better, leave nothing undone for the day and be perfectly prepared for tomorrow.  In the 1980s I worked for a company that was very goal oriented.  That's probably an understatement.  They were maniacal.  Unfortunately it was an atmosphere that I thrived in because it drove me further to do well.  My work weeks turned into marathons.  I traveled extensively in addition to working long hours.  My health was dramatically effected resulting in ulcers, sleeplessness due to other severe gastric problems, anger and more. 

I worked for ITT CFC during the entire decade of the 80s starting off as an Assistant Branch Manager, rising quickly through the ranks and being promoted to a VP position responsible for 30 California branches, 300 employees and $200 million in assets.  I was pretty proud of myself.  This was all accomplished before the age of 30.  In retrospect I performed very well but wasn't ready for the challenges that I faced.  The positions opened up and I earned promotions because of ridiculously high turnover.  Our reputation for that was known industry wide and professionals that were probably more qualified for leadership positions working for competitors would not dare work for us.  You see, it was the pressure and what it did to us.  

Near the end of my tenure everyone at my position in the company (26 of us) was summoned to an emergency meeting called by the President of our company.  We were facing regulatory scrutiny, the President's job was at risk and the already enormous stress became unbearable.  On the flight there an associate began to panic.  He was breathing heavily, ran his hand thought his hair and large clumps came out.  We were friends and about the same age.  It was tough to comfort him but he finally settled a bit.  It hit me that this wasn't a tenable situation  Without boring you with too many details, our meeting with the President was the next day.  I ended up having a disagreement with him and was relieved of my position.  I was the 11th of 26 to leave that position in 1989 and it was a relief.  You see, I would have never quit, just worked more trying to solve problems, taking on more responsibility and causing my health to deteriorate further.  Thankfully I've never been on a plane flight again with someone experiencing life threatening stress or felt it myself.   

It was over 10 years before I again accepted a leadership position with any firm due to the effects of this portion of my career.  I leaned that no job is worth sacrificing my health, that it's time to slow down when I find myself fatigued or irritable and that no company puts my well being above profits or the personal agenda of my superiors.  I owe it to my family and myself to remain healthy, happy and to put us ahead of everything else.  Hopefully most of you aren't involved in this type of work environment but remember this story the next time that you are not willing to consider a position  that may be better for you.  You see, I told myself that I was happy too.  

Ode to a Life Long Friend

Shortly before 9 AM on Saturday my cell phone rang.  The caller ID indicated it was an old friend from Pittsburgh.  When I answered, his daughter Dawn greeted me, then told me that her Dad passed a couple of hours earlier.  

Ray and I were introduced in 1980.  I managed a finance company office and Ray owned an auto repair shop and tow truck.  The economy was bad and unfortunately my company had customers with delinquent car loans and my responsibility was to have them repossessed.   I contracted with Ray and after a car or 2 he told me that he couldn't do it any more as it was dangerous and his staff didn't want to assist.  I told him that I'd go with him and this was the beginning of a 40+ year friendship.  We spent hours in his tow truck in neighborhoods that we probably wouldn't venture into any longer.  We were involved in any number of predicaments and were fortunate to have safely returned home.  A trust was forged through those experiences that I probably can't describe.  

I moved from Pittsburgh in 1983 and Ray and I continued our friendship.  My Mom passed in 1990 and my Dad in 1992 and Ray was there to provide support, help empty and repair the family home and more.  Throughout the 90s we both faced some personal and businesses challenges and even though there were 3000 miles between us we intuitively knew when the other needed a boost.  Our families matured in the 2000s and we were both happily busy between work and our family responsibilities but always found time to stay up to date.  The last 10 years saw us both face a number of similar health challenges at about the same times.  Diabetes, Heart Disease and finally Cancer.  We both made changes and our Diabetes and Heart Disease trials passed.  Very recently Ray got great news about his Cancer.  It was gone!  Unfortunately it seems that the Chemo weakened him and made him susceptible to Pneumonia and a blood infection which took his life.   

After a mournful morning on Saturday I was able to recall the many good times that we shared.  Most wouldn't call getting physically  attacked  a good time but we did as those fights it forged a lifelong bond.  Ray could also always be counted on to do something to break up everyone in the room.  He was the master of telling a slightly inappropriate joke at exactly the wrong time, but somehow it worked.  As we moved into the cell phone era in the 90s I could count on regular phone calls from Ray testing new joke material.  No hello or anything like that, answer the phone and hear a familiar voice telling a corny joke.  The frequency increased with the ability to text.  It seems that jokes always came when I needed a lift.  That was an uncanny knack that Ray possessed.  

I woke up with a funny thought about Ray this morning.  I can see him having a beer in heaven and with his mischievous grin asking God why Iron City Beer is no better in heaven than in Pittsburgh.  

I miss you old friend! 

Change the World

Yesterday while at Church we had the pleasure of seeing the kids perform songs they learned during Vacation Bible School last week.  We are a small Church, I'm estimating about 300 regularly in attendance, but had 119 kids turn out for last week's session.  An effort like that requires a ton of volunteers and it seems that the congregation was up to the task.  Videos of the week long event were shown and there was an abundance of activities and it's obvious that the kids had a blast and that the adults and older kids poured a lot of love into the little ones.  It was tough not to get choked up thinking about that and the impact these kind folks made in the lives of the kids.  

After service I began to think about the fact that these volunteers didn't just show up but its' quite possible that their efforts changed the world, at least for a number of the kids.  Not everyone receives the emotional support, love, nutrition, attention, and encouragement that they need.  For a week the volunteers at Life Community Church (https://www.facebook.com/lccpaso) provided that without limits.  Have you considered what you can do to change someone's world?  It may not be a week of work at Church.  Maybe a kind word to the grocery clerk, a complement to a neighbor,  assisting someone that you know that may be physically limited, going to a senior home and visiting a resident regularly.  The list is only limited by our lack of desire to consider where we can impact.  I know this is something that I plan to improve upon immediately!  

One of the foundations of Rotary International is "Service Above Self" and Rotary provides countless opportunities to serve within your community and around the world.  It's easy to locate a local chapter.   

Whoever brings blessing will be enriched, and one who waters will himself be watered.  Proverbs 11:25

Graduation

The journey is over, but, it's just about to begin.  Take some time to appreciate your accomplishment.  Your perseverance and hard work got you here, now you have a lifetime of possibilities.  

It's a bit intimidating isn't it?  How can you possibly know what you are going to do the rest of your life?  It's hard to talk to your family because they have their expectations for you.  If your experience is like mine, I got little help from my teachers or counselors in learning what to anticipate.  You have choices to make but the good news is that time is on your side.  Be assured that you are not the only one feeling like this even if nobody else is talking about it. 

If you're graduating high school the one decision that you need to commit to is to improve your skills.  If college isn't for you, that's okay.  Learn a trade.  That may mean going to a trade/technical school or beginning at an entry level to be trained by your employer.  The work today may not be where you want to be but as you develop skills you will have opportunities become available that you haven't considered yet.  If you are inclined toward college but undecided that's okay too.  I encourage you to start school in the fall enrolled in STEM classes needed for your general education requirements.  Not thinking about a scientific or technical vocation?  Take the classes anyway.  What you learn will serve you well and you will find that your best career options for compensation and stability are in those fields.  If your committed to other areas like Social Sciences, take the STEM classes anyway.  You will still need them to graduate.  

If you're graduating from college you have some different thoughts.  Now it's time to choose an employer in your field of endeavor.  I suggest that mid size or larger firms will best serve you early on.  Their systems usually are superior including training, mentoring, etc.  Benefits are also important and you will find those companies probably have better benefits. Begin to invest in your employers retirement plan (they may partially match your investment) even though it's a lifetime away.  They may not contribute on your behalf if you don't make contributions.  In effect, you would be walking away from free money.

Let's discuss money.  Money is important.  Don't let someone tell you to "do what you love."  "Love" is an emotion and it may change.  Love grows.   Passion changes but your need for money for the remainder of your life will not.  You've made a substantial investment in your career both monetarily and with your time.  Maximize your investment.  It's good business.  I am not suggesting that you work someplace that you hate, but, I am advising that you always stay aware of your value to an employer, discuss your perspective with your superiors and stay active within your industry having regular contact with peers at other firms to learn about how they are valued.  Don't hesitate to have conversations with competitors about what they may offer you and don't fear change.  You will retain your friends, make new ones and become every bit as comfortable with a new firm if you select well.  

Finally, you are going to feel stress with all of this to consider.  Again, you're not alone.  I believe your family is your source for support but I also understand that they may not have the skills, education, or experience to help you to make the decisions that you need.  They still love you and can help you through the process and that comfort will relieve your stress.  Find mentors.  The Chamber of Commerce often has SCORE volunteers that would happily meet with you.  Talk to your pastor if you go to Church.  Counselors at schools that you are considering may be valuable as well.  

The most important thing to remember is that you are loved.  At times in life you will be overwhelmed and that is important to remember at those times.  

This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.  1 John 4:9-10

Blessings and good luck!  

Don't Do It!

 Recently I was working with a candidate and helped him to leverage a new position in leadership with a national firm.  The company made a good offer which he promptly accepted and arranged a start date.  Early on during the on-boarding process something came up not to his liking and he emailed me on Easter Sunday.  It was an issue that I was certain could be overcome and told him as much and he agreed to allow me to follow up on Monday morning.  By Sunday night something changed and he sent a scathing email to the hiring manager and others in the company.  To call the message less than professional would be an understatement.  I quickly responded to him privately yet he was steadfast in his anger.  The hiring manger opened the email shortly after and handled everything is stride and resolved the concern by early Monday morning.

In this instance it appears that everything will work out but my counsel to anyone is to not make a call or send an email when frustrated or angry.  Bad choices are made that may not be undone.  

  

An Early Thanksgiving Message

I know many of you will be travelling for Thanksgiving next week so I thought I'd write my Thanksgiving message a bit early.  Let's start by wishing you and your loved ones a great Thanksgiving as you recount your blessings with joy.  

It's hard to believe but we often don't recognize what we have to be thankful for, until it is almost taken away.  Twenty months ago I was diagnosed with a "slow moving" prostate cancer.   By last Thanksgiving it had accelerated and treatments were scheduled to begin after the first of the year. I was concerned but not fearful as I had been diligent about screening.  In January I began treatments with injections that made me irritable, lethargic, exhausted and sleep deprived.  Radiation started in April and the regimen was daily until June.   It exacerbated the side effects of the earlier treatments and I thought that it would never be over.

During this time I worked daily (most days actually) but often went home early due to exhaustion.   I know that my productivity suffered, that I wasn't pleasant to be around and my family suffered with me.  All treatments ended in June and my first follow up was in July and my prognosis was good.  My Thanksgiving present was a blood test that I think reflects good results again but I will know for sure when I visit the Doctor on Monday.  Since August I have been slowly returning to normal; working out regularly, losing weight, being productive at work and regaining my cheer.   

This year I will be celebrating my ability to go to the gym, be productive at work and be a good husband, father and employee.  My boss has become a close friend and while I have appreciated his leadership and friendship I recognize that I never grasped how thankful that I should be.  I actually have Thanksgiving daily at this point for some of the things that I have noted and many more.  I wake up with a smile and try to take the time to revisit everything that I have to be thankful for.  

Happy Thanksgiving!  

The Week In Review

Friday is usually a day where I spend some time to survey what happened during the week, things that are important and other things that I found interesting.  Here are some random thoughts. 

Church on Sunday focused on Hebrews 12:14 "Work at living in peace with everyone, and work at living a holy life, for those who are not holy will not see the Lord."  This was pretty convicting for me.  I have a tendency to be sarcastic.  Is that an action that is in alignment with finding peace with everyone?  Probably not, much like anger, ego and resentment, all that I can better manage. 

I read a social media post by Harvey Mackay noting that 60% of high school students admit to cheating, 52% of employees admit to theft of office supplies and 43% of sore merchandise losses are due to employee theft.  Pretty disturbing. 

In working with a client this week my contact became upset because I was not "respecting their process."  That process works fine.  The issue is procrastination and lack of communication.  It is tough to recruit and hire in today's market with employee shortages.  A clearly defined process with timely action and clear communications is expected by those that you are considering hiring.  

CNN reported that companies are rushing to implement robots into their workforce with orders of 29,000 being placed through September.  That is a 37% increase vs 2020.  The shortage of staff won't last forever but the use of robots will.  Make sure that you are always improving your skills/knowledge so that you can't be replaced by technology.  

That's it for the week!  Enjoy the weekend! 

Boys of Summer

Yesterday concluded the regular season for Major League Baseball.  My Pittsburgh Pirates played down to their expectations this season losing 101 games but the summer was still grand.  I got to spend much of it with my first love, baseball.  As a child the off season was long, dragging through fall and winter before the teams reported for spring training.  Today we have a steady stream of information about trade rumors, winter league performances of prospects, salary negotiations and more.  Still, there is nothing like the hope that comes with the players reporting to Spring Training.  

What I love about baseball is that regardless of your performance, tomorrow is a new day with a new game and the game isn't over until the 27th out.  Time never expires.  Even in a losing season there is hope!

In 2021 my Pirates were atrocious at times, entertaining at others and provided inspiration throughout the season.  I watched perhaps the most bumbling play that I have ever seen, some rookies getting called up and playing well providing a glimpse of the future and some veterans greatly under performing.  The player that failed to live up to expectations on a large scale provided me the most inspiration and probably the most joy to his teammates.

Gregory Polanco was a highly touted prospect that was just beginning to make an impact when he was injured in 2018 causing damage to his left shoulder that I believe never was the same.  He made no excuses, worked hard, stayed in phenomenal condition but flat out stunk in 2021.  In the face of being booed continually he had a perpetual smile, was loved by his teammates and continued to be an integral part of the team even while not performing.  Management probably waited too long before releasing him and I am certain that was a tribute to his hard work and attitude.   On 8/27 he had a game that reminded everyone of his potential but it was too little, too late and he was cut a few days later.  He moved to an other organization in the minor leagues and had a great September.  

Polanco became my favorite player in the midst of his failure this year.  He fought through adversity and maintained a great perspective.  I am praying that his efforts are rewarded.  In the meantime he made an impact on me that will not be forgotten.  And.... in about 4 months the Boys of Summer will be back! 

Just Do It!

 I am sure you have seen the commercials with these slogans. I see people daily with these or some variation on their workout gear at the gym. The problem is, I don't see many people in their professional and private lives push past complacency. It's easy to get comfortable, to feel that everything is good and to be satisfied, and yes, probably complacent. You owe it to yourself, to your family and to your profession to be the best that you can be. If not, your fire for life fizzles, your drive at work slows and you eventually wake up and ask, "Where did the time go?"

I know that change is uncomfortable. Tony Robbins tells us "Trust me, the ups and downs, the stomach flips, they're worth it. The world doesn't need more comfortable bystanders, drifting on autopilot. We desperately need you at your best, giving this world your best work."

I speak with many of you on a regular basis. Please remember this during our next conversation. You'll be glad that you did!

Do you read frequently?

I am partially through reading The Polish Officer, a novel about Europe pre WWII.  I often read historical fiction desiring to learn more about different times and challenges faced by others.  While the characters and their personal circumstances are creations I have found many of the books to be factual in a historical context.  Additionally I read books about business, books to learn or improve skills and biographies and autobiographies about significant historical figures and modern day heroes that have overcome extreme adversity or impacted the history of our country in a positive way.  

Like most, I wasn't an avid reader as a child.  I enjoyed outdoor activities far more and had my fill of reading in school.  I picked up my reading habit early in my professional career as I traveled extensively for business.  It was a great way to stay occupied while on planes, in airports or hotel rooms.  It permitted me to improve skills, learn new things and expand my base of reference regarding my personal life and thoughts.

Getting back to The Polish Officer, this paints a picture about real life challenges in Poland in the late 1930s as Poland was occupied by German and Russian armies.  Ordinary families had their lives greatly disrupted, wealth was confiscated, family members enslaved or murdered.  It's a great reminder of the value or our freedoms and a vivid reminder about how great we have it today.  

Remember the old TV commercials for "Reading is FUNdamental?"  If you aren't a regular consumer of books, give it a try.  You'll be glad that you did.  

Awe Struck!

For years this was the view from my living room and deck.  I woke up in the morning and found myself counting my blessings and returned home after work with the same joy.  Did I deserve such beauty?  

It's been several years since we downsized and our view is nowhere near as spectacular.  I keep this photo as the wallpaper on my phone as a reminder of the beauty of life.  Now when I look at it I think of all of the fullness in my life.  A loving wife and daughter, the blessings of good friends, a job that I enjoy, the companionship of my dogs and more.  God has given me grace and beauty that I do not deserve and this serves as a daily reminder.  

I am not always as grateful as I should be.  I let things that go wrong or are unexpected throw me for a loop and lose my focus on what is important.  When I view this picture of God's creation and remember James 1:12 ("Blessed is the one who preservers under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those that love him.") I suddenly realize what I should be thankful for.  

Are you focused on gratitude? It changes your perspective every time that you remind yourself.  

What are you going to do?

I know that I have posted about this in the past.  The demand to hire qualified talent is like nothing that I have seen.  Companies are struggling for months, leaving positions open, and not finding the people that they need.

I speak to engineers daily recruiting them for these openings.  I have to say that I am always surprised by the lack of professional curiosity.  I hear most often that "I am happy."  I have to question if it is happiness or complacency.  Nice people work everywhere.  If you are working on a project there will be projects elsewhere.  Your current project will be taken well care of by your company.  The fact is that no matter how happy you are, how well cared for you may be from your employer, that today another company will listen to you carefully and create a package that will far exceed what you are currently receiving.  

Were you in the industry in 2008-2013?  If so, you have to realize that things aren't always like they are now.  Raises were minimal if not non-existent.  Companies were forced to make staff reductions.  It didn't necessarily matter if you were happy, if you had been loyal or anything else.  There wasn't work for those with less experience and those with more experience were too expensive.  Those market forces will reappear.  In the meantime you owe it to yourself and your family to maximize your potential and earnings while the market is competitive.  

What Stops You?

I've been a bit of a procrastinator this week.  I always intend to work out 2 mornings during the week in addition to Friday afternoon, Saturday and Sunday.  I reset my alarm for later each morning when it went off at 5 AM.   Today I finally forced myself up and went to the gym and I am glad that I did.  I feel terrific! 

Recently a friend broke down and went to the doctor as he was feeling horrible. He was very concerned that he had a heart issue.  After extensive testing he learned that his heart was healthy but his Diabetes was very high.  He knew that he was Diabetic, takes medicine daily but pays no attention to what he eats.  What stopped him?

In both cases it is a level of contentment and a lack of pain severe enough to cause action.  We all do it if we are honest.  I see it regularly in my business.  Here is an example.  I helped an executive find a new position after 20 years with her current firm.  She wasn't looking, had no interest in change but eventually I convinced her to hear what one of my clients might be able to provide.  This was over 2 years ago and she would tell you it was the best thing she has ever done.  Why did she wait so long?  She was content.  

The takeaway here is to not allow your contentment or limiting beliefs hold you back.  Be open minded, explore and most importantly believe that you can do more.  

"Do the uncomfortable.  Become comfortable with these acts.  Prove to yourself that your limiting beliefs die a quick death if you will simply do what you feel uncomfortable."  Darren Rowse

 

We All Belong!

 9/11/2001.  So tragic.  So many lost.  I know you will see a multitude of tributes over the next few days.  This won't be one that you'll see elsewhere.  

I always see or hear "We will never forget!"  What does that mean?  What lessons have we learned?  How were we changed?  I am not talking as a collective.  I am asking you to question yourself. 

In the days, weeks and months following 9/11/2001 we witnessed the best of the USA.  Volunteers poured into NYC to assist in the rescue area.  On the day of the attacks we watched brave men & women rush into buildings to rescue others when ordinary people would have run the other way.  Pride of being an American was at an all time high.  Race, national origin, religion, ethnicity played no factor and we were at our best. 

Let's be clear, 9/11 was an attack because evil people hate our way of life.  We saw that at the time but have since forgotten.  We don't place the same value on our way of life as we did following 9/11.  The same types of evil people have tried a different attack and it's results are more devastating.  The tactic being used is to divide and conquer.  They are winning this battle.  Groups are being identified as evil, not because of their actions but because of their skin color.  I can't imagine why anyone would consider teaching a child that they have what they have due to privilege.  I can't imagine teaching a child that they have odds stacked against them due to their skin color.  Children are to be nurtured, loved, made to feel secure; not to be made ashamed or bitter.  If we want to help the disadvantaged among us to succeed we must reinforce their self esteem, help them gain skills and stop the destruction of the nuclear family.  

Further, the tactic of identity separation is destructive.  Anything that drives us further apart is counter productive & we are allowing that to happen.  On 9/11 and shortly after we first identified as Americans regardless of our other "identities."  Those that hate us for our way of life have succeeded in further dividing us with this approach.  I am not an American first but I am a Man of God, a husband, father, and an American that is proud of his Italian heritage.  Our heritage, religion, politics and more can be celebrated, remembered and lived while recognizing that the freedom provided in the USA allows us to do so.  That is why most of our ancestors came here and why this is the greatest nation in the history of the Earth.  

My lesson from 9/11 is that evil exists and is a force more powerful than I recognized.  It continues to attack and we are failing to see it.  Most importantly I learned that WE ALL BELONG to this great nation that we call the United States.  Let's not be divided.  

Join me in praying for those that we lost on 9/11, that they are with our Lord and that one day their loved ones will be happily reunited with them and experience the love & peace that they lost that day.  Join me in praying that all of our children feel loved, secure and nurtured & that we find ways to better help all of them maximize their potential.  Let's also pray for a recognition that as Americans that we are Brothers and Sisters with more in common than we recognize and that we learn to love others that we don't understand or that we disagree with as God would have us to love them.  

This Bible verse stuck with me after the sacrifices of our First Responders on 9/11.  John 15:12-13 "My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.  Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends."  Let's work daily to expand the numbers of those that we consider friends to include those that we differ with and to be blind to those differences much like the brave men and women that rushed into the Twin Towers and Pentagon to save others on 9/11.

Breaking News

Do you watch the news or follow the news on websites or apps?  I'm betting most of you do.  Have you ever considered the effect that has on you?  I have and it has caused me to try to limit consumption.  Occasionally I realize that I am paying more attention than I should.  Today was one of those days.  

Like most days I woke up to a warm smile and hug from my wife.  My dogs were excited to see me.  I got up, shaved, showered and moved to the living room to catch up with the news.  Covid surging, violent crime, hateful politics, homelessness, government mandates, power shortages.  Often I find some joy in catching up with my favorite baseball team, the Pittsburgh Pirates.  Nope, we are in last place and among the worst teams in Major League Baseball.  We lost last night and the stadium looked deserted.  I got dressed for work and hit the road. 

Starting off I thought about how lucky that I am.  I have a wife and daughter that love me.  Dogs that bring me joy.  A house in a nice community and much more.  Traffic was heavy near the high school that I pass on the way to the freeway.  I saw groups of young men and women happily enjoying each other's company while walking to school.  At a crosswalk a young man carrying his shoulder pads jogged across the street on his way to class and probably football practice later.  Once on the freeway traffic was heavy as well with hundreds of my neighbors on their way to work.  I wonder, how is their day starting off?  Are they feeling as thankful as I am?  I hope so.  Finally, I arrive at work and my boss/friend's familiar truck is already here.  I recognize how lucky I am to be healthy and able to work, to work with a friend and do something that I enjoy.  

So today's breaking news?  Life is grand!  Enjoy every minute!

What if ...

What if your were taking care of a family member diagnosed with ALS?  What if a dear friend was about to undergo surgery to remove their stomach due to stomach cancer?  What if a friend that hadn't been feeling well for quite some time finally sees the doctor to learn that he/she had a heart attack at some point and needs bypass surgery?  What if a close friend and his wife were diagnosed with Covid?  What if you personally were just told that you have prostate cancer or were undergoing treatment?  

You see, the friends with stomach cancer, heart disease and Covid are all friends of mine that are fighting these severe ailments currently.  They and their families are each impacted severely.   I myself was diagnosed with prostate cancer and recently finished treatment with a good prognosis.  My wife and daughter were equally burdened.  Why do I tell you about these things?  

I learned long ago that I should learn a lesson through everything that I encounter, good or bad.  Over the last few days I have been searching for the lesson in all of this and I believe it is this:  it's about loving others.  We encounter people daily, at the store, bank, at work, friends, barbers, waiters and waitresses and more.  Imagine if they are dealing with any 1 of the issues that I noted above or one or more of any others like job loss, divorce, addiction of a loved one, etc.  It would probably explain a poor attitude, bad service or many other things.  You might be experiencing some of these same worries and not realize how you are being perceived by others because of your circumstances.  

What I pledge is to be a better neighbor, friend, customer, etc; not be judgmental so quickly, smile more easily and remember that everyone faces daunting situations throughout their lives.  My responsibility it to walk in love and display respect, honor and care for others while understanding that I can't possibly know the challenges that others face.  

What Anchors Hold You Back?

Our limiting beliefs often determine if we succeed or fail.  It may be failure in a single instance or area or it may be an inability to reach our potential in life.  Today we are exposed to many things that create limiting beliefs.  Wouldn't it be much better to talk about how we can create better outcomes?

I was fortunate to learn much about work and life from my Dad.  Additionally I always seemed to find excellent mentors.  I learned many lessons from my mentors, my father and through self reflection.  Here are a handful.

While seeing a movie about Vince Lombardi in school there was a portion about being on time.  Lombardi believed that you should always be a minimum of 15 minutes early.  I strived for that most of my life.  Even now, I am never late.  I decided that was the beginning of making a good impression in the workplace.

My Dad always taught me that other's may be smarter, faster, stronger, etc, but, nobody should ever be able to work harder.

Go to your strength.  I was in a new position and a bit over my head.  I was placed in the position because of 1 particular area that I was always successful with.  A friend noticed my stress and reminded me, "Do what you do best and what your were put here to do." 

Nothing can stop me but me.  Another similar ideal of mine is that it isn't over until I quit.  

At the end of the day, when you are ready to go home, there is always something else that you can do.  It may be something that you have put off, a phone call to a client, making sure that you have a plan for tomorrow or tidying up your desk/office.  Look around, reflect and close the day strong.  

We have an obligation to pass our lessons onto other and I have always been cognizant of that.  I always inspired my team to be better than I was and invested heavily in helping them maximize their potential.  I had no fear of being replaced.  Leadership is about getting the most out of others.  I loved to surround myself with future leaders.  Let's all strive for that and help them meet their potential.  

Wow, That's Expensive!

I keep seeing indications that it is difficult to hire.   Actually, that fact is kicking me in the pants and beating me on the head!  I bet that you are feeling it too.  

I recently walked into a McDonald's restaurant.  Signs were posted on the door offering to hire 14 year old employees at $15 per hour.  I have friends in the restaurant industry that are reducing their open hours because they can't hire staff.  Target announced plans to cover the cost of tuition, fees and books for part time and full time workers.  Walmart, Chipolte & Starbucks have similar programs.  

Sysco CEO Kevin Hourican recently explained during an investor call that they are being forced to delay or "pause" deliveries to many customers due to lack of drivers and warehouse help.  How would you like to explain that to your Board of Directors or direct supervisor?  Do you think that those customers aren't finding other vendors?  Do you think they are coming back?

 The fact is that hiring educated and skilled staff is even more difficult.  What are you doing to improve your hiring practices?  It is readily evident that the status quo is failing.  

Everything Matters

On Sunday I received a call from a close friend.   Ray was calling from the hospital, awaiting surgery later this week to have his stomach removed due to Cancer.   Ray lives 2500 miles away yet we have remained friends since I left Pittsburgh in 1983.  He was always the strongest man that I know, physically imposing and mentally strong.  Thinking of him in a hospital bed and unable to eat or drink is such a contrast of what I know Ray to be that I was stunned.  

During our conversation I was at a loss to offer anything comforting.  I just felt powerless and I am sure Ray needed or wanted more than that from me.  After hanging up I began to beat myself up.  Why haven't I called more?  It was easy to avoid due to the time difference but now that excuse rings hollow.  Now that the shock has passed, I will be the friend that Ray needs.  

I've had similar emotions in the not so distant past.  I was in a hospital bed awaiting surgery for a stent in my heart on Christmas Day, 2013.  More recently I was treated with radiation and injections for prostate cancer.   Both times I felt weak and helpless, not just physically but mentally.  With too much time and uncertain outcomes I focused on the things that I should have done better.  The list was long each time.  My promise today is to often refer to this entry and recognize that everything that I do matters, to quit having excuses for not being a better friend, husband, father, coworker, employee, or member of my community.  I hope that you reflect upon what I have written so you too can live a rich life without those regrets that really seem to come at some of the most crucial periods of our lives.

In closing I ask that you pray for Ray to have a healthy recovery, adjust well to the changes that he will have to make and that between now and his surgery tomorrow that he is free from fear and feels the love of God. 

The Tragedy of Afghanistan

Regardless of your political ideals one has to grieve for what is happening in Afghanistan.  Innocent people are being slaughtered and our government failed to anticipate the realities of our withdrawal including the danger to our own citizens.  Before going any further I encourage for you to pray for our citizens safe return, for the heroic members of our armed forces who are there to save them, for the innocents in Afghanistan and for our leaders to find better solutions for this country.  

Some of the rhetoric surrounding this situation is astounding, especially the idea that the Afghanis haven't fought for themselves.  Since the beginning of the conflict 66K members of their military & police have died along with 47K civilians.  Without our support they have little chance against the Taliban.  The plight of women & children is particularly disturbing and it appears that we have made no plans to help brave Afghan citizens that acted as guides, interpreters and more who are sure to be slaughtered with their families.  

Now we must stand as citizens of the world, as Americans and as righteous people and insure that our government takes actions to save our citizens, to prevent the slaughter of innocents and to protect those that served and protected the members of our military during our 20 years in Afghanistan.  

Peter told us in 1 Peter 4:10: As each has received a gift, use it to serve on another, as good stewards of God's varied grace.  

We have received many gifts as American Citizens.  Let's use our influence with our elected leaders and let them know that what is happening is unacceptable and that the must fix this immediately to spare every innocent life possible.